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Couch Surfing How-to

Tags: couchsurfing, party.

I haven't updated for a while because I've been in Boston. This would be no excuse to update if I lived in Boston, but I don't; instead, I have many, many friends who live in Boston. These friends have couches.

So, given that I've been couch surfing at Northeastern University's dorms, here are some tips I've gathered:

• Give up the couch when someone else needs to crash. Sleep on the floor or on another person's couch.
• Have a way home in an emergency. For example, I have my bike locked up less than a mile away.
• Clean. Put your blanket and pillow away, tidy up the couch, pick up the kitchen from last night's party, take out the trash, etc.
• Do food-related services for the hosts. If you can cook well, do it constantly (breakfast and dinner). If you can't cook, buy them groceries or dinner. The $20 or $80 worth of food is a lot less than they're paying to house your sorry ass.
• Hide the fact that you're using their toiletries. Squeeze the toothpaste tube from the bottom, use a minimal amount of shampoo, don't use their towel without asking first, etc.
• You don't live there. It's funny to pretend that you're a roommate, but when it comes to an actual decision or vote you shouldn't be in the way.
• Ask permission before throwing the party. It's fine, fun, and funny to throw a party at someone else's house, just make sure they're in on it and can veto it. Remember that if they get in trouble for the party, you're out on the street.
• Be prepared to leave. They might need the couch for someone else that night, or might want time away from you, or are just plain annoyed by your mooching. Back-up couches and a way to get home quickly are useful for this.
• Be friendly. Really, who wants a jerk crashing on their couch? Deal well with the roommates and their jackass friends, too.